Radiation, Day One

Hi folks,
Well, the first treatment is now done. The first day entails a lot of measurements, with a number of big scary machines. The technicians were really friendly and tried their best to make me feel comfortable. I received four beams, one from the diagonal left, one from the diagonal right, one straight down, and the other straight up from underneath, through my back. I was captivated to hear so many pitches during the treatment. When the technicians left the room they rang a Big Ben chime. Then I heard throughout the remainder of the treatment a guitar line, followed by a chord, coming through the speakers. It played over and over. I knew the song from which these excerpts were taken, but couldn't place it in the moment -- I was too focused on breathing. But I knew the song had emotional weight. When I sang the song to Catherine after, she recognized it as Sting's "Fragile." It's a gorgeous song, and the excerpts are really pretty, although it's complicated to hear it when you know the lyrics:

"If blood will flow when flesh and steel are one
drying in the color of the evening sun
tomorrow's rain will wash the stains away
but something in our minds will always stay

On and on the rain will fall
like tears from a star, like tears from a star,
on and on the rain will say
how fragile we are, how fragile we are..."

An interesting choice for a radiation unit?

Over the music (which was repeated for the duration of my visit), I could hear the radiation as it was directed at me, the buzzing sound was unambiguous. Some of the beams were about 10-12 seconds, others only about 3 seconds. When I heard the buzz, I would slowly exhale and hold my breath, trying to breathe as deep into my belly as possible and keep my lungs low. The trick to this is staying calm and not needing too much air. I managed with the arm cuff, although it really is high and they repositioned my arm higher twice during the treatment. It was sore after, but loosened up pretty quickly, so I'll manage. More physio tomorrow.
What surprised me most is that my skin was red and warm after the treatment. I really suspected that the first day I wouldn't feel anything and it would build slowly. The redness is now gone, but it remains quite warm. It's important now not to try to imagine treatment on day 25, but take one day, one moment at a time.
That's the lesson in all of this.
Much love,
Kip